A Thanksgiving Week

 Thanksgiving week...

1. What a weird week, a Thanksgiving like no other we've experienced. I think part of the odd cruelty that exists with 2020, the pandemic, and all that our family has endured is that we wish we could just forget it all and move forward; yet, because its all so novel, everything becomes memorable. This year's Thanksgiving certainly feels this way. We did video calls with both sets of our families in the morning, had our meal, but not a whole lot else. The day felt heavy; the video calls were nice, seeing everyone. But the depth of what has been experienced, the knowledge of both what, and most importantly who, we are missing, felt like an abyss at various times. While we tried to stick to some traditions - a big meal, some comfort recipes, planning for Christmas shopping (and even doing a fair amount online already) - it was difficult to keep our heads up. As I've written before, this holiday seems so wrapped up in my father-in-law's presence, especially the last several years. It was hard to imagine this holiday without him, and that remains true.

It was also so very, very long. Usually, the holiday feels frantic, celebrating multiple Thanksgiving meals at different places, driving to various places, all the conversation - it makes those 4-5 days of weekend feel like not enough time. Without all the traveling and multiple celebrations, the weekend shopping and late nights of conversation, it almost felt suffocating - all this time left alone without distraction to continue to process this difficult of most difficult years. If nothing else, it is a good thing that we all like each other; if not, all this time would be unbearable.

All this said, we know (at least intellectually if not emotionally) that we have much for which to be thankful. We know how much worse this year could have been, even as awful as it has been. There is a cliche that loss helps you understand and appreciate what you have; I suppose there's a kernel of truth there. The emotion I've been wrestling with this week is to be thankful for what has been lost, because of the perspective it brings. Also, thankful, in a sense, for the grief itself. One cannot grieve with having first loved; we grieve for the love that has been lost. I think the challenge this year, at this Thanksgiving, is to remember to be thankful that we had the love in the first place.

That continues to be a work in progress, for all of us. Now we head into the chaotic stretch between Thanksgiving and Christmas with bated breath, so to speak, to see how those in our community respected the recommendations to stay apart this holiday season to flatten our rising spread of COVID-19 cases and, more importantly, the increasing hospitalizations that are overwhelming our local hospitals. It will likely be a a bit of a roller coaster the next two weeks, with this first week showing a lag of reporting, and the following week showing whether people made the necessary sacrifices, or continued in the behavior and choices that have gotten us to this point. I want to be hopeful, but I remain extremely worried.

2. On the health front, a mixed bag this week. Hitting the treadmill felt very difficult each time, but I did manage 4 times this week, at least maintaining my weekly goal. On the eating front, being more conscientious in my food choices, it was not a particularly good week. I am aware that such will happen from time to time, and holidays have always been particularly hard weeks for me in this regard. That said, I am more honest with myself on this then I have in the past, and I understand the overall lifestyle change I am trying to make. So, in that respect, the week doesn't concern me, as I know I stay committed. That said, hoping for a better overall week ahead.

3. I hit my goal of 84 books read for the year this past week, with over a month to spare. I suppose that's what not having any place to go due to a pandemic will do for you. Number 83 was the middle grade work One Time by Sharon Creech. A really interesting take on the power of words, images, and imagination, and how they form stories; cool to see a book like this in the middle grade genre. Book 84 this year was the 2019 Pulitzer winner for Fiction, The Overstory by Richard Powers. Sometimes you read a book and it is easy to understand why it wins awards; that's the case for this book. The book was deep, intricate, complex, while impacting a reader's real world views. This week, I'm continuing Yuval Levin's A Time to Build, and picking up A Burning by Megha Majumdar.

And away we go ...