What Are We Busy About?

I've always abhorred the statement of "I don't have enough time."  It's not because I don't understand the sentiment behind it or because I think people are just complaining.  Many of us live busy, hectic lives, and the thought of adding on another responsibility, another obligation, another event, another whatever seems to easily invoke the phrase of "I don't have enough time," particularly consider that time is a finite resource.  As for complaining, I do that with the best of them, so I'm not going to throw stones on such.

No, I dislike the statement because I firmly believe that in most cases its not accurate.  It's not that one doesn't have enough time to do some additional thing, its because such additional thing is simply not as important or as necessary as the things currently taking up one person's 24 hours each day.  Thus, when someone says they do not have enough time to volunteer for some event or activity, or watch something, etc., they are saying that said event or show is just not as important to them as it may be to the person asking.  Often, I think we say we don't have enough time because it feels like its better for all the feelings involved.  For example, if someone asks me to join a community gardening foundation/board, if I say I don't have time, that someone understands (because we all have hectic, busy lives).  But if I say, well, gardening is not really my things, we run the risk that the other person might feel offended (even if no offense, of course, if intended).

So, anyway, I don't like the phrase, and I try never to use it.  I try to remind myself to fill my time with things I feel are important and enjoy doing, and understand that if something comes along that is a better option, I should jump at the opportunity, even if it causes me to stop doing something else.  Because time is a finite resource for us, making the most and best use of said time is so important.  So, if I feel that volunteering is a better activity than reading, I should volunteer even if it leaves less time for reading.  If I feel that reading is a more worthwhile experience than watching a football game, I should build my time around reading, not games.  Its not just a question of time management, its a question of priority management.  As long as I do a good job managing and evaluating what my priorities are, I will not regret how I choose to spend my time.

I thought about this stuff a lot about a month ago, where it seemed like my "extracurricular responsibilities" [the collegiate term I give to my non-work obligations], were getting a little overwhelming.  First week of August, I had meetings on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday night.  The second and third week of the month I had meetings each night of the week.  I would work, come home for the length of time it took to make dinner and eat, and then be off to a meeting, which on averaged lasted two hours.  I enjoy the things I am involved in, whether it be through our church, through community service boards, through political organizations; but I started to think whether this is how I wished to spend my time going forward.  Obviously, not every month was going to be like that.  But consistently, these so called extracurriculars occur on at least 10 or so days every month, for several hours.

These reflections were put in even sharper focus over the last few weeks, as Jackie and I worked on sharpening our understanding of our finances, attempting to do a little fundraising for our hopeful eventual adoption, and remembering why we doing these things: so we could have a child, and a family of our own.  In terms of that priority management I talked about, nothing would come before family; and thus, making sure I am balancing my time consistently with my priorities.

So, in the last few weeks, I have been thinking about all those extra things I am involved in, and attempting to determine where my priorities lie, so I can make the best decisions for whenever an adoption occurs and we have our own child.  I've long looked forward to being a dad; and I plan on spending as much time as I want (feel appropriate, etc.) on being one.  And I think I need to keep my reading habits, for the peace that it gives me, or keeping my insanity in check might become an issue.  But focusing on my volunteering, and the various organizations I am involved with, and determining where to cut back, will be difficult.

But it won't be because I don't have enough time. It's because I want to spend my time in a different fashion. I enjoy being busy, as I like to keep my mind away from idle thoughts.  But I want to make sure I am being busy about the things I most want to be busy about.

"It's not enough to be busy, so are the ants. The question is, what are we busy about?" - Henry David Thoreau