In my quest to provide more regular updates here, I imagine this blog will become, should I stay true to that quest, a very adoption themed blog for the next several months. But I suppose that's very appropriate, as that will be the primary focus for both Jackie and I over that time, and it feels like we will be spending much of our free time working on the paperwork or fulfilling the various requirements of the process.
In any event, as I wrote in my prior post, last Wednesday Jackie and I traveled down to Indianapolis to a seminar put on by the Adoption Support Center. Following their session (or, more honestly, during it), we both came to the same conclusion - this was the place for us. The way they go about their business, the ongoing support and counseling they provide to birth mothers, the honesty and willingness they have information about themselves, made us both feel this was the right place for us. So, we signed on with the agency and are officially starting the adoption process. We left with a packet of paperwork, a scheduled office interview and home study class over the next two months, and lots of anxieties and excitement, but mostly hopes and dreams. It's a simple way of saying it, but it was truly a very good feeling.
Over the weekend, we started addressing the first section of paperwork, which consisted mostly of demographic information for our respective families. The questions were simple, providing information for maternal and paternal grandparents related to their date of birth, education level, occupation, health concerns, etc. They then asked about the children of the maternal and paternal grandparents, i.e., our aunts and uncles, and parents.
I, of course, found this patently unfair (j/k) as Jackie got off very easy. Her Dad's parents had three kids. Her Mom's parents had two kids. Thus, she only had to provide all that information for five individuals, and after a quick phone call with her parents, had it done in a matter of minutes. My family on the other hand is a different story. My Dad's parents had ten kids. My Mom's parents had nine kids. So I had 17 individuals to track down the information for. Needless to say, my phone call with my parents took a little longer. And we are still working on getting all the information and confirming it.
We mostly found it funny, and I believe Jackie enjoyed my fake exasperation at the inequity of it all. But as we sat at our dining room table filling out all this information, sometimes commenting on how frivolous it seemed, I could sense our happiness. As mundane as this was, we were excited to fill it out, because it starts that process that we hope, that we dream, leads to adding to our family. And the fact that we approached this particular paperwork with that excitement, and chuckled about our family size disparity, instead of feeling bitter, or approaching it begrudgingly, confirms for me, and I believe for both of us, how right pursuing adoption is for us.
"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be." - Douglas Adams, The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul.
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