A Week Where the Struggles Continue

 And so it goes ... 

1. I'm not sure what to say about the last week, except to say that life continues to be heavy. If I had to guess, I think the fact that we are just a couple weeks removed from seeing family for the first time in forever, and having that juxtaposed with looking ahead knowing that we are entering a period of several months of uncertainty related to the pandemic - not knowing when vaccines will be available, not knowing when we will be able to see family again - hit hard this week amidst our the ongoing national concerns and our mundane routine week. Whatever the reason, the heaviness lingered over the entire week in our house, making it feel as if moving through a heavy fog, never knowing what the next moment will bring.

2. On the health front, I've written the last couple times my inability to keep focus on stay on track. That continued this past week. I've always been a bit of an emotional eater - food as a stress release. Being stressed about things going in the country, the overall mental health of our family, and the usual stuff of life has continued to overwhelm. I try not to beat myself up too much -  I did still manage to walk on a treadmill twice despite everything; the schedule was still haphazard with evening meetings at our local library as we worked on selecting a new director (replacing the founding director who has been there for 40 years, no pressure!); and I understand this is about a long term process for changing my habits. That said, I feel like I need a good week this coming week, to feel like I am not sinking back completely into bad habits. 

3. As for reading, I finished book number 3 for the year, Notes on a Nervous Planet by Matt Haig, a book I needed to read, and continues to make me pause when I think about how I interact with the digital world and, more importantly, what I expect from the digital world. Otherwise, I continue to work my way through Monopolized and The World Doesn't Require You.